Gray's 2nd Birthday: the sentimental stuff.

And suddenly you're two.

Dear Sweet Boy, you have brought way more love, laughter, and joy to our family then I ever imagined possible. You are silly, spunky, cuddly, and downright funny!

I just adore that you still love to be held, love to climb on things and love to snuggle with your blankey. Just recently you've developed a new-found love for reading. Yay. :) It's so cute the way you run to the bookshelf to find your favorite ones and bring them to me, crawling right on top of my lap and laughing with anticipation.

You think that whatever Sky does is cool, and copy everything she says and does. Though you sometimes push her hugs away and squeal with disdain when she touches you, we all know you really love it deep down and think she's the coolest thing ever. You gives her hugs a lot, but it has to be on YOUR terms.

You have the bluest eyes I have ever seen, and the cutest 2 cowlicks right in front of your forehead that are sure to bug the heck out of you 10 years from now. You look like a mix between daddy, uncle Jason and uncle Bud. Though Sky was born with the highest pitch voice, you are opposite with a very low, raspy little-man voice. But when the two of you are laughing, I cannot tell your laughs apart. This melts me.

When you fall down, you immediately jump back up and say, "OHHH I'M OKAYYY!" and continue running. When you wake up from your nap, you're either one of two extremes: super happy, or extremely irritable. Nothing can calm you down like a hug from mommy and your blue blankey. You rub the tag on your blankey and all is right with the world again.

You've just recently discovered your singing voice. You'll sing your little heart out when you don't think anyone's listening. It cracks us all up, which only encourages you to sing this way more. You're all about a good time! You love it when I turn up the music and dance around holding you in my arms. You laugh uncontrollably when I spin you around the room and can't catch your breath from laughter when I slide you across our wood floor with a big blanket. You also have no fear of being dropped and sprawl out when I hold you, in hopes that I'll do something crazy to you like drop you onto the sofa. You love to be rough-and-tumbled. I think I'll finally have a roller coaster buddy when you're older. :)

When Dada comes home from work, you stop whatever you're doing to run to the door and greet him. You'll announce, "DADDY HOME! DADDY HOME!" --and give him a big hug. Sky climbs on his back, and you hang on his neck. You both adore your daddy.

I never want to forget all the little details of your toddler self! Here are some of your favorites:
food: clementines, raisins, bananas, and avocado with honey
veggie: broccoli
clothes: naked
color: pink
books: Goodnight Moon, Goodnight I Love You, Little Bunny's Bedtime, I Love You Through and Through and his Spot books
toy: your new alligator ("add-igator") and the Fisher Price cash register
shows: Fresh Beat Band and Blue's Clues
stuffed animal: blue bear
sports: football and soccer
game: build 'em up/ knock it down
songs: "Rock-a-Bye Your Bear" by The Wiggles

Mommy and Daddy pray with great faith every day that you'll grow up to be a strong man who loves and fears the Lord. I pray that when mommy and daddy aren't there to help you, you will call upon the name of the Lord and know that Jesus will be your stronghold when the ground beneath you gives way. I cherish every bit of you being young and don't want you to grow up ANYMORE! But on the other hand, watching you grow is so very exciting. You're such an incredible blessing to all who know you. I pray you'll always feel this way. Love you, Little Bud.

xo

Mommy

"Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You" -Dr. Seuss

choosing to trust

As a mom of a precious kindergartner my heart was so heavy as I saw my daughter off to school this morning. I had all weekend to snuggle her, laugh with her, and cherish all the smart and witty things she says. But the moment she jumped out of the car and ran into school this morning, I felt sad. Specifically-- I felt fear and doubt. Fearful that that will be the last time I'll see her. Fearful that the same evil, horrific thing will happen at her small school. And doubting our decision to send her to public school this year. What were we thinking?!

My heart is still grieving for those who lost loved ones on Friday. And I haven't been able to figure out how to mourn without it taking over my thoughts.

I wonder if other moms might be going through the same feelings this morning.

I can already tell it's going to be a long road of trusting The Lord and resting in Him as we finish out the school year. I need to take my thoughts captive. I will not be at the mercy of every passing fearful thought that drifts in my mind. I have the ability to take a hold of each thought and control it. (2 Cor. 10:4-5)

Psalm 46 and this message by Mark Mullery has been much comfort to my heart as I seek to replace my fears with the truth of God's word.

"Therefore we will not fear though the earth gives way, though the mountains be moved into the heart of the sea, though its waters roar and foam, though the mountains tremble at its swelling." (Ps. 46:2-3)

-->He is here with me, never to leave me, never to forsake me. That is the message of Psalm 46. GOD IS my refuge and strength and security and assurance. 

God's agenda isn't always to remove me from whatever difficult situation I am in. But his agenda always, always, always  is to be with me. 

So I will take hold of this truth. We will finish out this year strong and fight for peace along the way. I will put off every thought that is filled with fear and doubt this morning. I will trust The Lord.