choosing to trust

As a mom of a precious kindergartner my heart was so heavy as I saw my daughter off to school this morning. I had all weekend to snuggle her, laugh with her, and cherish all the smart and witty things she says. But the moment she jumped out of the car and ran into school this morning, I felt sad. Specifically-- I felt fear and doubt. Fearful that that will be the last time I'll see her. Fearful that the same evil, horrific thing will happen at her small school. And doubting our decision to send her to public school this year. What were we thinking?!

My heart is still grieving for those who lost loved ones on Friday. And I haven't been able to figure out how to mourn without it taking over my thoughts.

I wonder if other moms might be going through the same feelings this morning.

I can already tell it's going to be a long road of trusting The Lord and resting in Him as we finish out the school year. I need to take my thoughts captive. I will not be at the mercy of every passing fearful thought that drifts in my mind. I have the ability to take a hold of each thought and control it. (2 Cor. 10:4-5)

Psalm 46 and this message by Mark Mullery has been much comfort to my heart as I seek to replace my fears with the truth of God's word.

"Therefore we will not fear though the earth gives way, though the mountains be moved into the heart of the sea, though its waters roar and foam, though the mountains tremble at its swelling." (Ps. 46:2-3)

-->He is here with me, never to leave me, never to forsake me. That is the message of Psalm 46. GOD IS my refuge and strength and security and assurance. 

God's agenda isn't always to remove me from whatever difficult situation I am in. But his agenda always, always, always  is to be with me. 

So I will take hold of this truth. We will finish out this year strong and fight for peace along the way. I will put off every thought that is filled with fear and doubt this morning. I will trust The Lord.